Why Is Life So Hard?

A question we all ask ourselves... well, maybe not all, but most of us ask at some point in our lives.

Me, being the non-religious person I am, I do not believe life is hard because of the whole Adam and Eve being banned from the garden of Eden caused our lives to be difficult.

But I do believe everyone has some sort of problems in their lives, no matter how rich, poor, or middle class you are.

If you ask me, I think I have a HUGE black cloud that follows me EVERYWHERE!! Really. And it isn't even me that causes the problems. It's external dilemmas that ALWAYS seem to pop up everyday and put me in a horrid mood. I can't remember one day that I have been happy the whole day through.
Here are some examples:

My Car- Everyone knows I like to keep my car nice, neat, clean and free of any altercations. Well, now it has an altercation. An issue came up where now there is a quite large dent in my hood and the alarm won't work on it as well as it should. This happened in, I believe, June. Cost to fix it? $550. How much have I saved up to fix this? $0.00. Nice, eh? I would have saved more, but I have a kid to take care of and $150 biweekly just doesn't cut about anything.

My Credit Cards- Are currently maxed out. This is what happens when you try to live a normal lifestyle with an unsteady income. Current balance? About $1500. I really don't pay attention anymore as long as I pay a little every 2 weeks when I get paid.

My Camera- Has been in my life for about 3 years now. I remember when I first bought it. It was about June 2007 and it cost $250. I loved it dearly and people who know me well know that I do not travel anywhere with out my camera. My camera was my 3rd baby. I love it more than my phone. I love pictures. I think pictures are more than just pieces of paper. They are memories. It tears my heart to pieces to throw away photo albums (which I was forced to do for undisclosed reasons) I guess its because my mom's pictures were all lost or destroyed, so I have no clue what she looked like before her senior year picture. But now, it is broken. No more pictures of Mia's development which REALLY hurts alot because I am working on a book (and scrapbook) about her and I need pictures. Dearly. Unless I can some how use my paycheck from this 2nd job and squeeze by with my library check for a few weeks, I guess I'll just be depressed/angered for a while. =[

School- Is kicking my behind this semester. I am not sure what it is but I can NOT get enough sleep at night. I will get 8-9hours of sleep a night, wake up, and be completely exhausted STILL. I can't remember anything I do in class by the time I get home. I'll study chemistry or math for 6 hours and forget everything I just did. I don't know what is wrong with me, but if this keeps up, I am just going to have to stop doing the Pre-Med thing and just do something less demanding. Maybe something that will require less energy. I swear, I think I drive to school half asleep some days because I'll be at one area and pop back into consciousness 5 minutes later. I need to see a doctor...

Money & Males- Yeah. Don't have it. Never had it. I always seem to take care of EVERYONE except myself. I don't even think I've even had a boyfriend that actually bought ME dinner or bought ME a nice gift for my birthday or Christmas or anything. (I've always been the man in the relationship. Whipping out my card to pay for the movie, dinner, etc...) I literally attract Mama's boys and beggars. It's always ME spending my hard earned money on others who do not deserve it. Which I have learned to completely stop. And I also think it's a reason why I would rather be alone than in a relationship... but who knows. I'd take being alone for the rest of my life than to have some punk @&* boy all up under me. I already have 1 kid. Don't need two...

But they always say that life doesn't come easily and each struggle you come out stronger.
So after all this mess, I'm probably gonna be the freakin' Hulk, man...