Monday, April 6, 2009

Why didn't anyone tell me?

Yes, everyone knows motherhood is full of surprises and such. Some enjoyable, Not so enjoyable. But sometimes, I wished someone would have told me to "look out!", "watch your step!" or just a big ole "caution" somewhere.

I wish someone would have told me...

1) How much labor really hurt. Yes, we all hear that is painful, but how painful? I'm good with pain, not afraid of needles, etc... I wouldnt care getting piercings & what not b/c pain is temporary. But labor pain is... Jesus. I did not think it was going to end. Seriously. No wonder no one tells how bad it hurts b/c we don't wanna remember that pain! It's indescribable! Nothing can compare to that feeling.

2) "Hey! We're gonna give you this numbing medicine, but we're not sure if it's gonna work on you." When I got my booty sewed back together from my 4th degree laceration, the midwife gave me local anestetic. It still hurt. The nurse gave me half my dose of anestetic in my IV. Felt the stitching. So my doctor said "Give her the rest of the dose." More drugs in the IV. Still felt the sewing. All I felt was drowsy, high & pain coming from my rectal area. Gosh..... Crack probably could have cured me better than that freakin' medicine!

3) Babies have explosive bowels. These sweet little things have some CRAZY bowel movements. Once, I was changing my daughter's diaper in the hospital & poo shot out at me. I dodged that sucker like I was dodging bullets in Compton. Oh man! Nasty junk. Too bad daddy doesn't have as good reflexes as mama! She boweled all on his shoulder when we got home from the hospital. (lol) I wish I had taken a picture of that b/c it was beyong priceless...

4) I wouldn't get a full night of sleep for a LONG time. I have slept a full night since December. I had HORRID insomnia while pregnant. I mean BAD. Late night Faceboo-ings when only 3 people are online. Yahoo games here there. Then my fat-fat comes along & I know I'm not gonna sleep often.... Almost 3 months in, I thought the late night feedings would have ended... I guess not...
sleep Pictures, Images and Photos

5) People will come up to you & try to talk to touch your baby. People I don't know. Especially elderly, Caucasian women. They like to touch the most. (No offense. Im not racist!) Other races don't try to touch as often, but just look & the lil bla-otian baby. They always say "Aw! Baby! Boy or girl (if she's not in pink that day). How old is she? How much did she weigh when she was born? Is she a good baby? Does she sleep well?" My goodness! The questions never end. I wonder if they're gonna get in my personal life too. "Did you poop today? Was it nice? What's your blood type?"
Old Ladies Pictures, Images and Photos

6) People would be fascinated my a Black & Asian baby. Like you guys haven't seen Tiger Woods or Kimora Lee before. Come on! They're out there. It's not as common as black & caucasian, but they're out there too & they're people too.
Tiger Woods Pictures, Images and Photos
kls7 Pictures, Images and Photos

7) Avon is not hard to sell. Once you actually leave the house. People actually want this stuff even though I've never used it before & rarely heard about the products. Its really good stuff though. The Footworks products does wonders for dry cracked heels & feet. I LOVE it. Plus they have some bangin' mascara & eyeliner. It glides on so smoothly...
By the way, you can order Avon online in the comforts of you own home! At:

8) I would still be in pregnant mode & afraid to leave my house still.That's my problem. I still feel like I look like a moving basketball who only leaves the house to go to the doctor, store (only when its desperately needed) or fast food place because I was too huge & lazy to walk or try to fit in a booth. Plus waddling is never cute.

9) Baby thow up also shoots out of their noses. Its pretty sad b/c I don't want breast milk or formula shooting from my nostrils & I know it has to burn. My poor poopy baby...

10) My boobs would tingle & release milk when cries alot. It's kind of weird how your body knows that milk makes baby happy & stop crying.... its actually kinda creepy. How does it know?? I guess its the change in hormones when she cries that triggers the milk let down...

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