How I Missed Thee!

So, as some of you know, my little Mi-ster is currently 6 months old. Growing fast, talking, laughing and just being the cutest darn thing smokin'! (Not really smokin, but you get the slang) I just never thought she would be so developed mentally at this age. Sure, I know she knows I'm mommy. The boobie-giver. The one she kicks in the back to wake up in the morning then laughs at me because I look like I just got ran over by a truck.

I just never thought this would happen now...

So, I let Mia go visit her Papa on.... Tuesday. Every kid needs to see their father every once in a while, right? I drop her off, say bye, and head my little booty back home for some well deserved T.L.C, and I'm not talking about the band. *Comedic drums: buhdum-dum*

By about 9pm, I get a text from father saying "Can you get her; she's being very fussy." Of course I'll get her, but it was raining like a herd giraffes were peeing on my house so I told him I'd get her in a little when the rain lets up a little. Mostly because I had just did my hair earlier & it was lookin straight BOMB, yo! And its not too safe to be out driving in a freakin' hurricane with a baby. (Duh) He then offered to take her home & I was thinking "dang... she must be straight trippin' if he can't wait to take her home..."

My Mia arrives home & thank God the rain had let up alot cuz she woulda been hella wet. (I don't think I packed a blanket for him to throw over her car seat) I looked at my stink & she looked kinda irritated but I just thought "she fell asleep during the little 5 minute ride home". When I took her out of the car seat, she just "hugged" me & layed her head on my shoulder. I thought oh, she must be tired. I sat in the rocking chair to rock her back to sleep.

When I got up to put her down, I saw she was wide awake. I picked her back up & she layed her head back on my shoulder & gave me another "hug".

She stayed like this for about 15 minutes, and the first thing I thought was "aww... my little baby missed me that much!" She has never done something like this before. I guess because I'm around her like her conjoined twin, and she realized "Mommy is gone. I want mommy!!"

I know eventually she might be saying "I hate mommy. Why won't she go somewhere so I can b free. Gosh!" But for now, it's nice that she finds comfort in me when she feels bad, feels sick, or is lonely.

After all, they say there is nothing that can compare to a mother's love...

Laughing Out Loud

I love some of these funny tees. I think they're funny. Well, some are funny. Other are entertaining. Like if you saw someone in the mall & read one of these shirts, you'd be like "Wow." or LOL.

Here are some of the shirts I thought were entertaining...

A little nerd joke.

This one was good, but I say Tacos.

But all of these funny t-shirts can be found at www.clutchtees.com where you can buy them yourself! yay! Just thought I'd let you all know & have a nice laugh.

Sushi + Swine Flu = Qué?

So I was skimming the internet & came across this article about the swine flu. we all know about it, got scared & now it has pretty much subsided to just a little trickle instead of the waterfall of news & reports we had about a month or two ago. Sheesh...

You can find the original article here or just go to www.healthyfellow.com and read some other articles about health things & such.

The article was mostly about the consumption of fish oil & how it might be bad for you, may have a link to swine flu, etc... Researchers did a study on mice that were fed fish oil & corn oil rish deits & found the mice who had the fish oil had a slightly higher mortality rate than the other...

I know. We all thought fish oil was good for us, but then again, what is good for us anymore? Too much water can poison you body, too many vitamins can do the same...

But the big part of this study is that the CD8+ & CD14+ cells (found in the spleen to fight off infection & diseases) were less in the fish oil mice than the corn oil mice. Why is this important? Well, lower immune system + swine flu = NOT GOOD.

They also found that children who were FORCED to take fish oil (like my self when I was a youngster) had lower CD8+ and CD14+ cells.... Yeah. Thanks mom for forcing me to drink nasty crap & lower my immune system so I can't fight off the killer pigs... Show you cared a lot... (Like my sarcasm?!)

So what can we say from this? Wash your hands, use Germ-X & wear those stylish face masks!

And don't forget to thank you mothers & fathers for forcing you to drink/swallow that nasty fish oil as a kid. I know I will!

lol. Fish Oil.

Los Surveys Para Mi Boredom

1. you had me at hello. have you ever met someone who you instantly liked?
I don't think so. It takes time for me.

2. monument. when was the last time you felt pressured to do something or to be something?
hum... idk. probabky something with school

3. heartless. have you ever had a really rough/bitter breakup? yeah.

4. here's to the past. do you find yourself dwelling on the past often?
Not really. I try to look forward.

5. fast forward to 2012. what / who do you put first in life?
My daughter & school

6. plot to bomb the panhandle. have you ever felt like you gave into something for too long?
yah.

7. a second glance. what's the last thing / person you had to wait for?
Hum... I had to wait for Mia to be born.

8. the downfall of us all. - do you ever just want to pack up & leave where you live?
Yeah.

9. my life for hire. - do you tend to hold onto grudges?
Sometimes.

10. have faith in me. - do you think people have faith in you & your judgement?

I hope so.

11. homesick. - when's the last time you felt homesick?
When I was at school

12. holdin' it down for the underground. - do you feel like you've lost a lot in the past year?
I dont think so.

13. another song about the weekend. - soo ..have anything fun planned for the weekend?!
not yet. but maybe.

____________________________________________________________________________

Have you ever used bing.com?
nope

Who would you save, a dying puppy or a dying old woman?
Both!

Are your eyes the same color as your dad's?
Yes. Because we're black & most black people have brown eyes.

What is your boyfriends name?
Don't have one...

Do you like his name?
N/A

Do you know his middle name?
Lalala...

Is he embarrassed by it?
*cricket noise*

Have you ever met his parents?
*Cough*

Have you met him in person?
Skipping... what?! who wouldn't mee their bf?!

Is it a long distance relationship?
*Burp*

Is he older than you?
I go for older people anyway...

Have you ever crowd surfed?
No, They'd drop me.

Did you ever watch the Land Before Time when you were younger?
Yeah! LOVED IT!

Which Olsen twin do you like better?
Mary Kate

Are you single?
Why, yes, I am.

Have you ever gone to Warped tour?
No. I'd probably be the only black person there...

Do you prefer profile pictures by yourself of with someone else?
Doesn't really matter... But usually by myself. Cuz im conceited like that.

When's the last time you had Sunny D?
Long time.

Do you and your friends ever make up 'code names' for people?
Lol. yeah... those were the good ol' days...

Would you rather have eggs or waffles for breakfast?
Neither. I dont like breakfast food

How long would it take to walk to the nearest McDonald's?
Long time.

Who's the last person you shot a dirty look to?
Not sure... probably Khai

Have you ever burned a photo of you and a person you were angry with?
No.

Would you prefer working at a grocery store or an ice cream parlor? Why?
ice cream parlor!!!

Has anyone ever told you they liked you in a realllly sweet way

Yeah

What's the most comfy thing to sleep in?
My bed...

Does the last person who sent you a message online wear makeup?
Yes

Do you bring pillows on road trips?
Sure do

Do you like camping, or would you rather stay home?
Stay home

Do you think Super Bad was as funny as everyone said?
Its up there...

Where is the person you have feelings for right now?
Out of the house. Lost.

Are you one of those people who obsess over Audrey Hepburn?
Say who??

You're full of junk!

So, I still haven't lost those last five pounds of baby weight & it made me angry.

So I decided to do research on random foods that weren't so great to see if maybe I was eating them too much & maybe cut that junk back.

So I went to www.diettogo.com/blog and started to read some of the blogs. They are SO interesting! Like work outs that aren't good for you, workouts that are good for you, why you cant lose those last 10 pounds, but the 1 I was looking for was at the bottom. The top 10 worst foods.

Gosh. Doughnuts, margarine, Fruit Loops, Gatorade, Pop Tarts, Pringles, Pepsi, crackers & not my beloved bologna!!

Acutally... I think bologna is gross... I don't even think people know what it is... ugh...

Anyway. But it got me thinking...

"Wow... A lot of unhealthy foods are surrounding me... and what should I do about it?"

What should I do??

I should BOYCOTT!! No... that wouldn't do anything...

But what could a person do to try to eat healthier?

One thing.

SELF-CONTROL.

Yes, it is hard... But you can do it!

So that's what I shall do.

Try to cut out junk food as much as I can. Workout. (as much as I can) and then I'll be sexy again!!

For all you other dieters, make sure to check out www.diettogo.com/blog and read about ways to to get healthy with me!!

I'll be Phở-King!

I know. If you get the title... Its pretty funny ^____^

**Laughs at self for such a creative pun**

But ANYWAY! the reason for the pun.

Since I am an offical Pho addict, I decided to eat at every Pho-making restaurant in the Gwinnett area and some in Atlanta to find out where the best pho is! Woo-woo!!

Now some of you out there are wondering, "What the f**k is 'foe'?"

Well first of all, it is pronouced "fuh" like ur about to say the f-bomb with out the "k".

Secondly, it is the best damn thang out there to eat when ur just hella hungry and want a big bowl of lovin' & goodness. It will keep you full for hours.

Usually if I know I'm gonna have pho that day, i try to skip a meal so I can fill up & finish the bowl. mmmmm.... my mouth is watering...

Omg... just look at it... **Dies a little from joy**

So here is a list of places I plan to go to to try out theif pho and see which is better. Then I'll write my reviews on each!

#1 Pho Mimi

#2 Cali Cafe

#3 Saigon Cafe

#4 What the Pho

#5 Miss Saigon Vietnamese Cuisine

#6 Pheonix Noodle Cafe

#7 LA Pho

That's all I can think of now, but if you want to leave suggestions or join me on my pho quest, just let me know & we can get this party started!!

=D

It's not her fault she's so irresistible...

And the topic of the day! :

Cheaters, Players, Pimps and Hoes.

Sure, the hoes are kind of random, but hey! It went along with the topic.

You may be thinking, "Why Raven? Why such a controversial, hurtful, sexful topic?!"

Well, that's exactly why. It's a controversial, hurtful, sexful topic.

As I sit here & munch on my brownie & tortilla chips & drink my fruit punch, I wonder "Why am I having preggy craving now?" and "What would I do if I enountered a cheater, player, pimp or hoe? What would I do it I was the cheater, player, or pimp?" (Excluded the hoe on there. I'd never be that) So here are my opinions:

+If someone cheated on me (and someone has) I'd do this...

Of course he didnt have a car back then, but it's a very nice idea...

I could never tolerate a cheater and I'll put my foot down! (On his penis) It just shows yu cant trust him and what's the point of being with someone you cant trust?

+If I was the cheater... well, that wouldn't happen. I'd break up with someone before I'd go find someone else. Why cause the drama? No. Why be greedy?!

+If someone played me... Please see above. My goodness. He better have some good health insurance too. That's all I gotta say. (lol) No. I'd just drop him like it was hot and move on the the next best thing. It's his loss. So who cares? Sure, I'd be pissed as a muther, but it's just another guy who showed me his true face. Now if the "game" continued for a long time and he didn't tell me, then that's when imma have to turn into my ghetto alter ego & go at him. End of story.

+If I was the player, I'd be pretty darn good at my game, yo! ;]

But I'm not that way, so this wouldnt happen... But if I was the flirty-bitch type, then I'd be da bomb. Hang with a different guy everyday!

Now the pimpin's part... If I was a pimp, I'd get that tattooed on my side. I'd never encounter a pimp because I'm not a hoe. So that's done. But back to my pimp status, I'd be the #1 male pimp out there. Slappin', havin em turn some tricks, and be hella rich. *ahhhh* Beautiful.

But in all, this is more about leaving people who are not bringing you up.

If you know your girl or guy is a cheater, you can find WAY better. You dont have to settle just for them.

If you're talking to a player, why stay? (Unless you like that kind of junk) You can find someone who will actually commit to you and only you.

If you're a cheater, just admit it. It saves so much time wasted, much less stress trying to hide something and so much better because you're honest. And everyone loves an honest person!

If you're a player... Well... stop. We already have too many STDs being spread around our young age group and everyone know you ain't gettin' tested like you should be. Every 6 months? Every 6 months my ass...

No one wants this...

But everyone wants this...

And not hear this...

I walk like this cuz I can back it up.

Is it wrong to be overly confident?

I think not.

And that's my philosophy.

If you know you look good, let the world know. If you have big boobs, don't hide them. Let them be free! I you got too much junk in dat trunk, bounce it around! Be one of those girls the rappers talk about when they say "Long hair, don't care".

I believe confidence makes you sexy. Wonderful. Beautiful. And that's what I try to make everyone I encounter feel.

Confident.

Sure, my sister thinks I'm a little too confident. Only because I straight up say "No one is lookin' at you cuz they lookin' at my fine self ova here! Oh-kay?!" *points to self*

I'm sure she knows im kidding.

But the way I see it is if you don't believe in yourself, no one esle will. You only have one life to live so make the best out of it!

Sure you may not have as much money as Angelina Jolie, have the moves of Shakira or have the body of Beyonce, but there is something you do have.

Confidence.

You just have to dig deep, wake it up and show it!

Surveys!

All About My Daughter!

Her full name is:
Mia Phoukeo Khaiphanliane
Her birthday is:
January 21, 2009
Her astrological sign is:
Aquarius
She was born in:
A Hospital
I pushed for:
about 20 minutes
Labor with my daughter lasted:
about 2 hours
She weighed:
6lbs 7ounces
Her hair was:
Black & pin straight
She looks more like:
her dad.
Her eye color is:
Brown
Her room is decorated in:
Yellow & white patterns
Her favorite toy is:
her little striped zebra & monkey
Her favorite snack/food is:
Bananas
Her favorite show to watch is:
Spongebob
She sleeps:
very well
Her mommy's name is:
Raven
Her daddy's name is:
Tyler
Who visited you in the hospitol?
Thanh, Adiam, Latresse, Courtney, my family, Tyler's family & friends
Did you have a baby shower?
yeah, 3
Was she a planned pregnancy?
No
Does she have any siblings?
Nope!
Do you plan to give her more siblings?
maybe adopt...
Is she a mommy's girl or daddy's girl?
Mommy's girl!
Did you breast feed?
Yup! But weening now...

Milestones

What was her 1st word?
Dii?
When did she 1st roll over?
about the end of April
When did she 1st sit up?
June
When did she start walking?
N/A

___________________________________________

El-Love-o

Name Four Things That You Wish You Had: More money, happiness, new car, love

Name Four Scents You Love: Apples, Dior Addict, Victoria's Secret Noir & Heavenly

Name Four Things You Did Today: Woke up, took Mia to Tyler's house, chilled with my bud & Facebooked

What is your current relationship status? Single-ing & mingling.

What is your sexual orientation? Straight

What sort of people do you like, as far as what their interests are in life? Goal-oriented, fun-loving people

What physical traits do you look for in a potential interest? Nice looking obviously. Doesnt look like a straight bum-face

What kind of fashion-sense attracts you? Anything that looks nice on u

What kind of hair style do you find attractive on a potential mate? anything but this...

What is the usual age range you look at? I'd have to say between 18-21. But the 18 has to be older than me. Nothing past October 21, 1990 at 10:41pm (pacific time) [yeah. im specific]

What traits turn you off? The hair like above, hella ghetto, cant understand what ur saying, dirty (physically), just straight fugly, too serious, overly jealous, the list goes on...

Do you prefer to date various people or do you pretty much fall into monogamous relationships quickly? I'm doing the dating scene now & it seems pretty cool. Im not jumping into anything fast anymore

Are you afraid to ask people out on dates? Yes. To be honest. I guess its the insecurity kicking in

If you're single right now, do you wish you were in a relationship? I really don't care at the moment. If it happens, cool. If not, I'll be fine

What are the positive points about being single? No strings & contracts attatched, possibly. Freedom.

What are the negative points about being single? No one to pay for your dinner. lol. jk. No date to a wedding.

When single, do you often find yourself longing for companionship? No, that's what the girls are for!

How well do you handle rejection? Its ok. I'll get over it and move on

Do you miss your last sweetie? I'm fine.

Do you think it's better to look for love or let it find you? I say let it find me. I don't have time to go on a searching hunt.

What's the longest relationship you've ever been in? 1 year. And I'm surprised it even lasted that long. My god...

The shortest? ~1 month

Do you think couples should spend a very large amount of time together or space things out a tad? I say give each other space here & there. Not at their house from 8am to 12am every day

Have you ever found yourself worrying about commitment? Worrying?? Me?? No.

When involved with a person, do you try to think about the here and now or do you often think of the future? I try not to think of the future b/c u never know what might happen.

How do you prefer to handle disagreements? Talking.

How do you feel when your mate is mad at you and won't tell you why? Angry. Obviously.

Do you have a crush right now? Do they know? Yes and yes.

What's the longest period of time you've ever had a crush? oh god... idk... i'd say... about 2 years

Have you ever confessed your feelings to a crush? NEVER!!!

Do you tell a lot of people when you have a crush? Nope. Usually no1 knows except God

Has someone who had a crush on you ever confessed to you? Yeah

How do you feel about long-distance relationships? If both are willing to commit to it and u trust each other, then go for it. If not, *psh*... dont wasto your time...

Have you ever pined for someone when you're not around them? um... yeah... sure... awkward wording...

Would you get involved with someone if they had a child already? I'm not the one to judge.

What would you do if you got pregnant while in a relationship? *cough-cough*

Would you get involved with someone if they were previously married? Sure. Why not??

How big of an issue is religion to your compatibility? I dont care

How big of an issue to you is your mate's ethnicity? Dont care. I have my likes & dislikes though

In a potential mate, how important is intelligence to you? . You better be able to hold am educated conversation.

In a potential mate, how important is a sense of humor to you? I love funny people. And they love me =D

What makes your heart flutter and brings a big cheesy smile to your face? Cute things people do. (duh)

What was your first kiss like? I dont even remember it...

What part of a person's body do you find most attractive? Their face

What's the first thing you look at when you look at someone you're attracted to? Their face/smile (if he smiles...)

How important are the looks of a mate's face to you? You can't be a hideous beast.

How important are the looks of a mate's body to you? Its whatever. I'm more of a personality person (See everyone! Raven B. is NOT a shallow bitch! In yo face!!!)

When you kiss someone for the first time, is it usually you who initiates it or the other? Both

Have you ever casually made out with someone who you weren't seriously involved with? Yeah.

Were you single at the time? Yes

What are your ticklish areas? I'm not ticklish. Sorry =/

What do you most like about making out? Idk. its just there. What's there to like?

Are you a virgin? I have a kid. You tell me. Unless I'm like Mary....

Do you believe in love? Yeah cuz I love my Mu-mu!

Do you believe in love at first sight? No.

Has someone ever told you they loved you? Yes

Have you ever told someone you loved them and meant it? Yes. Stink-stink know ;]

Have you ever told someone you loved them and not meant it? Yeah

Are you a monogamous person or do you believe in open-ended relationships? Monogamous. I aint gettin no STDs. I never learned how to share in kindergarten.

Have you ever been married? Nope

How do you feel about marriage? It's nice...Who knows?! Maybe I will one day.

If you're currently not married, do you foresee yourself ever tying the knot? Maybe. But idk to who or what I'm looking for

Do you plan on having children someday? dot-dot-dot

Have you ever had your heart broken? No

Have you ever been dumped? No

Have you ever dumped someone? Yes

Have you ever mutually broken up with someone? Yes. Thank God...

Has a romantic companion ever made you cry? Yes

Have you ever made a romantic companion cry? Yes. lol. sorry... I didnt mean to laugh. I just thought of a funny situation. hahahahaha! omg. let me stop...

Have you ever had an emotional pain so bad it made you sick or physically hurt? No.

Have you ever been unfaithful? NEVER EVER EVER NEVER NEVER EVER NEVER EVER! I'd cut myself first. (Yes, Raven B. has morals too even though im agnostic! Amazing!)

Have you ever been cheated on? Yes... sadly...

Have you ever learned an important lesson as a result of a break up? Yes.

Have you ever gotten back together with someone after breaking up? Yes. Why? Dont ask...

Did it work? Nope

Do you believe there's hope for people after they get back together or do you think the same problems that caused the initial break up will resurface? The problem is always there...

Have you ever broken up with someone and remained friends afterward? Yeah.

Have you ever broken up with someone and become bitter enemies? Oh yes. Im not saying any names...

If so, did you ever made amends? Never. We dont even look at each other if we see each other

Have you ever broken up with someone and lost touch? Yeah

Have you ever gotten back in touch with an old flame after a time of more than 3 months of no communication? Nope

Were you afraid to do so? N/A

Do you ever check up on old flames without actually contacting them? What. By stalking?? No.

If you've ever lost touch or went sour with someone you loved, how did it make you feel? I saw it coming...

Have you ever longed to get back together with someone? No. I haven't. Except with Johnny Depp. He just doesnt know we were together... lol

What a day! *Phew*

So. I went over to my friends house.

Fun times. Relaxing days. Entertaining minutes.

So when I get there. We decided to have some deep thoughts with herbal remedies. Very nice. I wasn't a huge fan, but maybe I'll try it again.... eventually...

Nice... Nice... sitting outside with the birds chirping away. Talking. Strange old lady riding her bike. Morning mist all in my hair making it all types of BIG. -___-

Other than that, we went inside where we viewed Kenan & Kel!

I was surprised it was on. I used to love that show. But after watching it now... I was like "Wow... They're really dumb. I can't believe I used to watch this like it was God." And I never realized that the dad on the show was SO scary looking... (Sorry. I couldn't find a scary pic of him... maybe next time)

Then we proceeded to workout. My GOD that was a workout. Push ups, Pull ups, crunches, leg lifts. Up-down-up-down. Back-forth-back-forth. In-out-in-out. Swoosh-swoosh-swoosh-swoosh. Bam-bam-bam-bam. 1-2-1-2. Wee-wee-wee-wee. Ahh-ahh-ahh-ahh.

I am so sore and I believe my amigo can agree.

I don't think I need to lift a finger, let alone walk for a week. I burned far too many calories...

But it was a well deserved workout and I should do it more often. Probably some time soon.

That's why it's always good to workout with a friend. It makes things SO much more fun. =D

This I Promise You...

So, now these days with all the crazy relationship hype, "hook ups", one night stands, threesomes, foursomes, many-somes, and whatever else there is out there that I missed, it's hard to think there are any serious relationships left. Really.

But there are! And they're real!

Of course, I am not cool enough to be apart of this

clique, but maybe one day I will. =D

Woo-hoo!

Anyway. People in these "serious relationships" occasionally exchange gifts. Flowers, chocolates (ew!), clothing, jewlery, etc...

But I think the one thing many girl (and guys.... if you're that way) would love to get/have is a promise ring.

I know. AWWWWW! How cute! *tears of joy*

A beautiful piece of jewlery that shows that your love is dedicated to just one person (guy or girl) until you get married or die.... which ever comes first.

"Your in a wonderful relationship. Suddenly, on your 2 year anniversary, he pulls a box out of his pocket. You open it and see its a beautiful, sparkling ring lookin' you in the face! You squeel with excitement and put that baby right on you finger."

Sounds like a perfect teenage love story. Now you have some blang-blang on yo finger to show off & flaunt in front of your friends, family, strangers, your dog, etc. that says "Hey! I gotta man and he loves me so much he put a ring on it."

To me, I don't care about those types of things. If I was with a special someone, I wouldn't pressure him into getting me a promise ring just so I can show off to other girls that "I gotta man & he luh me!" (yes, I used "luh" not "love" to add emphasis on a ghetto accent) Singin' "Single Ladies" to him in his sleep so maybe he'll get the hint subconciously. ("If you like it then u better put a ring on it")

To Rav.en, rings don't symbolize jack to me unless you are getting married. Other than that, you can get me a ring. But to me, that doesn't necessarily mean you're not going to leave me for someone else or some other booty on the side. He might have got you the ring to make you shut up so he can sleep in peace. And not for the right reasons. As in "I'm getting you this ring to symbolize our love for one another." Not "Here trick. Now will you stop bothering me?!"

Serious heart break if he said/meant that.

But yes. Material possesions are not everything. I don't need a Bentley, Mercedes, Jaguar, some Cognac, a little yacht, or a vacation on a beautiful Croatian beach to show that someone cares. (But that Bentley & vacation would be nice)

To me, I don't need a ring to show or symbolize my feelings for someone I've been with for a while & deeply care about. Just knowing that we're on the same page is good enough for me. =D

Plus with this whole recession thing, who got money or good enough credit fo' a ring? Fo' realz.

Sin poemas y sin flores. Con defectos, con errores...

So we all have imperfections.

And don't think you don't.

I'll find them.

But the thing about imperfections is that they make us who we are. Makes us different. Unique. Beautiful. Sexy.

So I'm going to be out there with mine so maybe it will make someone out there who doesn't feel too great about themselves not feel alone. (Becuase I'm just THAT kind) =D

Where do I start?

+Oh! I can NOT leave the house looking indecent. I have this weird feeling that SOMEONE might pop outta nowhere & take a pic & put it all over Facebook Myspace, Flickr, Photobucket, de.lici.ous, xanga or anything! I even hate going to get the mail in PJs and jacked up hair. OMG.... I hate it. I run to the mailbox & run back inside. I just feel like looking ugly will be the death of me or something if someone sees how I truely look. ugh.

+Here's a big one. I have two different big toes. I know. How did this happen? One looks like my mom's & the other looks like my dad's. Now everyone is going to be looking at my toes but whatever. LOOK! Take a picture with it!

+My pinky toes are like... strange. But I like looking at them even though its SO weird. It's my trademark. Gonna open a nail shop called "Pinky Toes & All". It runs in my family. Both of my biological sisters have it & Mia is the only grandchild to inherit the infamous pinky toe. Ooooh! (They're gonna hate that I put their pinky toes on blast)

+I'm only 5 foot and half an inch. Why won't grow that extra half of an inch? Only God, Buddha, Mohammed, Confucious & Jesus know why. (Yes, I support all worldwide religions, even Wicca)

I'm short, ok.

+I have little boobies! And I am proud. I shake them around (as much as they can move) and I love them! They grew since I had Mia. I mean really, an A cup isn't much to deal with... but hey! Now that I'm a whole B now, let's celebrate! **Pops -virgin-champagne**

+My legs won't get any darker. They're like.... 2 or 1/2 shades lighter than my face & arms. Pretty sad.... I guess because I wear jeans year round but whatever. I like my jeans. Shorts make me feel exposed & whore-ish. Yet, I can wear a bathing suit with no worries... hum... I'll never get me...

+I can't walk past a mirror or my reflection without looking at myself. Insecurity? Maybe. Cocky-ness? Possibly. Mixture of the two? I think so.

+I think I could shed a couple more pounds. But then again, who doesn't? Except people from countries & ethnic groups who enjoy "thick women" who have "meat" on them. So to those people I looks good. But sorry. I could lose a little stomach flab, thigh crust & arm jiggle over here! (To me atleast.)

+My eyebrows have their own mind. They may be thin but they grow everywhere. Sometimes I just wanna shave them off & get them tattooed on, but I wouldnt look good with thin, live eye brows. I look better with the kinda think Beyonce type brows of the eye.

Well, that's all I can think of right now. I hope you enjoyed my imperfections to look at your own & realize that they're there for a reason. Embrace them. Love them. Love you!

And yet another journal entry...

"Dear Mia,

Things have changed in your short 5 & a half months of life. Today you finally got to meet your Auntie Callie. Although she doesn't look like Mommy or your other Aunts, she is still your aunt. End of discussion. *Laughs* She is my closest sister and my best friend, and I'm glad she got to see you for the first time so soon because Mommy went nearly 3 years without seeing her, and yes. It hurt. It meant alot that she came to visit the family because even though she's "the adopted daughter" and moved so suddenly, we still always thought and cared for her. Always.

But enough of that. Some things may be changing soon with our lives. I'm not sure how I'll react or, especially, how you'll react because you seem to have quite an attitude for such a small child...But I hope these changes are for the better and will make both of us happier. You know all I care about is your happiness. And even though Mommy has been going through some rough patches right now, you always manage to help me forget about them for a while when I see your glowing face laughing at me. But you aren't making me happy right now. You threw up in your hair while you were sleeping. Now you stink, and I wasn't about to wake you up to give you a bath. But it's ok. It's a good stink & you'll be mhy clean little stinky in the morning..."

If Little Kids Ruled the World...

I thought this was too funny to pass by....

If Little Kids Ruled the World
by. Alice Bradley
(Found in Parents magazine, July 2009 issue, page48)

Dear Mom and Dad,
Thank you for your interest in remaining my parents. Below is a list of my demands.

The Toddler Contract

I. Food
1. For breakfast, there will be only milk from my sippy cup while I’m watching television. (See section II)

2. From breakfast until what you probably call lunch, I will be provided with an unending supply of cookies. No arguments.

3. For lunch I will eat yogurt. Anything containing fruit on the bottom will make me pick out the fruit and throw it on the ground or else throw it up on your carpet.
a. So no fruit on the bottom.

4. From lunch until dinner I will enjoy having something to lick. Why not a lollipop? Why not seven?
a. Between licks, I may place the lollipop on your grandmother’s Turkish rug. This will be ok by you.

5. For dinner I will have macaroni and cheese. Any attempts to give me vegetables in addition to the macaroni and cheese will result in tears.
a. And don’t you dare hide anything in the cheese sauce, because, my God, how you will rue the day.

6. After dinner, you may provide me with ice cream
a. No frozen yogurt. Trust me, I know the difference.

II. Television
1. The TV will be on all the time, unless I say differently. You are to sit by my side, quietly, hands folded in lap, while I watch my shows.

a. You may arise to fetch me a snack.

2. No diaper changing or pleas to engage in physical activity will be tolerated during watching of television.

3. Turning off the television will result in much kicking and screaming.

III. Toys
1. There will be many
a. They will always be strewn about the house so that I may simply reach down and pick up a toy, no matter where I am.

b. They will always be loud, complicated and contain small pieces. I enjoy shooting noises that go w-shoooop! or zim zim zim.

c. Nothing that results in any type of learning, please.

IV. Friends

1. They should be available whenever I’m in the mood to use someone else’s toys or ingest someone else’s cookies.
a. These friends may not ever so much as look at my toys of cookie supply.

b. Ever, ever , ever.

V. Sleep

1. Is when I say, where I say and how I say. If I want to sleep upside down with my legs locked around my neck, then that’s how it will be.
a. And you will enjoy it.

VI. Affection

1. Occasionally I enjoy being hugged and kissed. I stress occasionally

2. I will not be pelted with wet-mouthed assaults on an hourly basis. Should you feel the need to hug or kiss, you must provide me with a written request.
a. And then wait for me to offer my pudgy cheeks.

Signed X___________________________________________

I bet Mia feels that way all the time...

It's you, or is it me?

This is a very nice song by Secondhand Serenade.

Which, surprisingly, is a one-guy-soloist... Not a group.

The song is about a guy who is fighting with his girlfriend and now that its over, he's recollecting on if it was her fault, or his own.

And now that it's over, he wants her back...

I thought I'd blog about it because it describes how I felt exactly a month ago.Sitting, thinking if I made the right decision.... If I should go back... If I should give it another chance for the

429,937 time.... until I realized that its my life. I need to do what I believe is best for me. And Mia. We're one. Mi-ven. And I should be able

to run my own life. Wear what I want, say what I want, smoke what I want, drink what I want without worrying

if I'm going to upset anyone or cause a fight.

And this was me after I fully thought out my situation.

Yes, no reason to sulk over.

I got over it and I am ok.

This is me now.

Lol. No. But if there's any volunteers who wanna back it up, please feel free to do so. lol.

This is me now.

Minus the platinum credit cards.

But I like this song. *sigh* now if I were only that bold to just cuss a dude out.

oh wait. I am that bold ^___^

lol.

so that's my youtube blog. there may be some more coming your way soon!

Peace out homes.